On the Bad Days

On the bad days
I paint my toenails red.
I enjoy the fantasy
(putting on)
My black party dress
(dancing)
On white tables.
My feet won't leave home.

On the bad days
I go to work crying.
Bury my scars in pink paper.
My high-heeled shoes
Sturdiest part about me.

On the bad days
I lay still.
Surround myself with green.
Afraid to stand, feel
Lightheaded
Play dough muscles.

On the bad days
My body feasts.
My heart gives a toast
To my dying bladder.
I grin blue sequins
Dip my eyes in gray.

by E. M. Soos